Match Ratings For WWE's Christmas Raw 12/25 From Sean Ross Sapp

John Cena defeated Elias
5.5/10

• John Cena gives his shirt and hat to a child in the crowd. 
• Elias interrupts. He's great. "I'll tell you one thing, John. Ain't no damn way for sure CM Punk will interrupt me." -Elias.
• The crowd angrily chants CM Punk. Elias sings anyway, and John Cena calls him a jerk for calling fans jerks.
• "Well I never thought of it that way"- Elias. Cena sings with Elias and gets punched.
• John Cena sold the shit out of that punch. Elias somehow makes a match between the two
• Elias heaves Cena with a slam, and hits Alberto Del Rio's old double stomp finisher. He holds Cena's hand up, which makes much more sense.
• He goes for it again, and no dice. Instead, he hits a belly-to-backbreaker.
• Elias is jumping to the top rope like he's spamming a spirit meter. All to get down and hit a spinning powerbomb. 
• Elias looks like he's running out of ways to kick Cena's ass, and almost gets caught in an STF.
• Man, Elias' punches suck. There's a sloppy spot into the Cross Rhodes from Elias. 
• Cena comeback, you know the drill. AA, win.

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Backstage Crappenings

• Kurt Angle and Jason Jordan share a Christmas embrace. Both Jordan and Seth Rollins want Joe, but instead they get a tag team title match against The Bar. Jordan and Rollins' demeanor changes after they hear they're getting a title shot. I like that. Angle tells Roman Reigns he has an IC title match against Samoa Joe tonight.
• Miztourage sing to Mickie James, Bayley, Sasha Banks. They see Goldust and give him Santa's Little Helper, which Goldust regifts to Titus. Then he bites at Titus, who throws the DVD.
• Samoa Joe cuts a promo backstage and says Dean Ambrose can now be at home with those he loves for Christmas, and stares at Renee. That was a fantastic line. 
• Cesaro talking with a mouth piece in has to be a rib. Sheamus gives him a card and a Dean Ambrose figure with no arm. Cesaro got Sheamus a Seth Rollins figure and a Jordan one. Sheamus doesn't want it, but Cesaro says nobody wants Jordan -- even Kurt Angle. 

Hideo Itami defeated The Brian Kendrick
4.5/10

• Demanding respect from the crowd verbally isn't really a babyface move.
• There are gonna be so many goddamn "OH'S" from the announce team as they try to get Itami's offense over. It really took me out of the match.
• The crowd sat on their hands for this one too.  Itami fucked up Kendrick on the G2S.

Absolution defeated Bayley, Sasha Banks & Mickie James
5.5/10

• This is the third time this match has happened in two and a half weeks, and the fourth time it was scheduled.
• Mickie James' kicks are on point tonight.
• Sasha bumped like crazy for a Sonya Deville clothesline on the outside. 
• There was a really good stretch to tag for Sasha, and a not so good elbow drop from Mandy Rose. 
• Sonya is really shining tonight.
• They Bayley hot tag works well, but Deville pulls Paige out after a Bayley-to-Belly.
• All hell breaks loose and Paige pins Bayley with Rampaige.  

Kane defeated Heath Slater

• Heath Slater does not seem excited to face Kane. 
• He gets beaten up and Rhyno keeps pushing him into the ring. After a brief comeback, Slater loses. 
• Rhyno gets chokeslammed after the match. He's really out of shape right now. Both Slater and Rhyno got hope spots.
• A guy in the crowd yelling at Kane about doing mayor stuff.

Finn Balor defeated Curt Hawkins

• Goldberg should be Curt Hawkins' 173rd loss. Or Gillberg. I'm not picky
• I like Balor's red gear. Everyone wears black. 
• This is a squash match.

BROKEN

• Bray Wyatt cuts a promo, but Woken Matt attacks Bray when he gets to the ring. The reaction to Hardy is deafening. 
• Matt Hardy is very, very over. 

Miracle on 34th Street Christmas Fight
Cedric Alexander, Mustafa Ali & Akira Tozawa defeated the Zo Train

• So there are Christmas themed weapons in this. Candy Singapore canes, popcorn tin lids, etc. Enzo takes a shot at Michael Cole and Gulak visibly says that he has nothing to do with that.
• There's an imploding 450 and a Lumbar check. This is a showcase for Cedric, who gets a title shot next week.
• Backstage, Enzo sees Nia Jax under mistletoe. They have their kiss split up by Alexa Bliss though.

Intercontinental Championship
Samoa Joe defeated Roman Reigns (c) via DQ
5.75/10

• Both of these guys seem motivated and have really good chemistry
• Joe is great at throwing a strike into his suicide dives.
• Awesome back and forth action.
• Samoa Joe eventually gets the win via DQ because Reigns wouldn't let up when the ref asked him to. This is super lame for a Christmas edition Raw title match.
• Reigns runs off the stairs and Superman Punches Joe. Then Reigns picks up the stairs and attacks Joe with them because he's out for REVENGE. Joe barely escapes.

Secret Santa Match
Braun Strowman defeated Miztourage

• Miztourage don't know their opponent until they come out. It's Braun.
• Bo sells a clothesline great. They lose. Braun wins. He kills them. They're dead. R.I.P in peace. 
• Braun continues the beatdown after the match.

ROYAL RUMBLE STUFFS

• Alexa Bliss talks some trash. Asuka enters the Rumble and kicks Alexa Bliss.

WWE Raw Tag Team Championships
Seth Rollins & Jason Jordan defeated The Bar (c) to become Raw Rag Team Champs
6.75/10

• Seth Rollins manages to put over the entire roster during a backstage promo 
• Jordan says he makes a good replacement for Ambrose and pisses Rollins off.
• That Rollins/Jordan backstage segment was bad ass. Jordan got heat, Rollins showed some fire and Rollins also put over the entire WWE roster about five weeks before the whole roster needs to be over.
• Jason Jordan still looks like he should be teaming with The Bar. Maybe he should have worn a different color or something.
• Seth Rollins is playing babyface in peril fantastically, even absent mindedly trying to tag a more absent Jason Jordan
• The European uppercut to Irish Curse was really good.
• Jordan's spear into the corner always looks so good. 
• Why the hell did the ref stop counting when Rollins jumped into the ring onto Cesaro? Cesaro had already been in the ring far longer than he should have.
• Jordan gets to the ropes on a cloverleaf attempt. This has been a great story with great commentary.
• Jason Jordan gets the win! New tag champs!!!