WWE Cruiserweight Championship
Drew Gulak defeated Akira Tozawa and Tony Nese (c) to win the Cruiserweight Title
- No wrestling during commercials, unless it's on THE KICK OFF.
- There's a great suplex into another guy hung up in the ropes.
- The GuLock is applied, but Tozawa sentons to break it up.
- Nese whiffs on a 450 after Gulak does a superplex.
- A Nese Dudebuster can't get a pin on Gulak because Tozawa attacks.
- The crowd is hot for this, which is why Cruiserweights should open on Tuesdays, too.
- Looked like Gulak was late on a pin break up after a deadlift Buckle Bomb from Nese on Tozawa.
- Drew Gulak wins the Cruiserweight Title with a Torture Rack Neckbreaker. Excellent match.
WWE Raw Women's Championship
Becky Lynch (c) defeated Lacey Evans
- Hot crowd tonight. They're reacting great.
- Lacey has great new gear, and Becky is rocking a ponytail.
- This is a lot of Becky catching Lacey's offense and dominating early on.
- A light "you can't wrestle" chant for Lacey Evans. Haven't heard one of those in a while.
- Becky Lynch gets caught and slammed to the mat, and Lacey works over Becky's arm.
- Becky does a great bridge out of a pinfall, but follows up with that lame step-up push kick.
- Becky rolls off the top rope into a traditional armbar, but Lacey gets out.
- Becky Lynch SCREAMING her spots. Did you see the Lacey/Charlotte match? I'd be screaming them out too.
- Either way, Lacey Evans has a nice Bronco Buster, and Becky's forearm is much improved. Becky has been laying in her strikes a lot more tonight, and I'm here for it.
- Lacey Evans does a half-assed Acid Drop and an ugly kick. She gets Disarmhered and submitted.
- The screaming spots and sloppy Lacey finish almost pushed it below recommended viewing, but the crowd was so hot for this.
- We see an Ali vignette.
- Paul Heyman was in Baron Corbin's office that Corbin has for some reason, and dodges a special ref and Lesnar question. I think Baron Corbin was implying that Kayla Braxton was tryna FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU here.
- We see a recap of the 24/7 Title happenings.
KO & Sami Zayn defeated New Day
- Kevin Owens just spammed superkicks. Like five of them.
- Swanton Bomb and a Blue Thunder Bomb land, respectively. Then a frog splash.
- Xavier is isolated and destroyed in the corner.
- We are like six minutes in and Xavier just gets his first real offense. They've beaten him down hard.
- For some reason Big E doesn't see Zayn running at him to knock him off the apron.
- Either way, he gets the hot tag and kills Zayn with suplexes.
- New Day hit an Electric Chair Splash with Big E doing the splash. That was neat. So was Xavier's turnaround leg drop.
- Midnight Ride is stopped, and Xavier instead eats Helluva Kick and a Pop-Up Powerbomb.
- Big E made Zayn's soul leave his body with that clothesline. Everyone ends up down after big strikes.
- Big E almost kills himself with a YOLO Dive.
- KO pins Xavier clean with a Stunner.
WWE United States Championship
Ricochet defeated Samoa Joe (c) to win the title
- Samoa Joe matches are snakebitten so I expect him to get a broken orbital and Ricochet to get diagnosed with a narrow urethra.
- This is hard hitting early, but not a lot we haven't seen before.
- Joe slugs Ricochet hard, and this match slloooooooooows down. Crowd is still about it, though.
- Ricochet changes the pace of this one with a huge dive and a springboard moonsault.
- Joe destroys Ricochet with a big German suplex (teased as a Dragon) and a big clothesline.
- Samoa Joe does an inverted 450 bomb. Does that make sense to you? Well, you have to see it.
- Ricochet wins with a 630. That was outstanding.
- Maybe WWE wrestlers heard everyone shitting on this card. It's not even dark outside yet and WWE is putting on a banger of a show.
- Several wrestlers are waiting on Ricochet to come through the curtain. Triple H congratulates him as well. That was a nice, different touch.
- The Club approaches and AJ Styles tells Ricochet he'll see him tomorrow night during his photoshoot.
Smackdown Tag Team Championships
Daniel Bryan & Rowan (c) defeated Heavy Machinery to retain the titles
- Daniel Bryan is over huge in Tacoma, no surprise. Heavy Machinery need to pivot and play the heels here.
- Otis does just that, wisely. Press slam, and a relay suplex to Tucker. Tucker destroys Bryan with a clothesline.
- A "please recycle" chant.
- Otis' power is just outstanding, and catches DB out of the corner. Starting to think Heavy Machinery wouldn't suck as a heel team.
- Otis misses a Vader Bomb.
- DB hits the YES Kicks, but Otis is firing up. This is insanely over.
- A slingshot belly to belly suplex from Heavy Machinery!!!
- This is the best thing Heavy Machinery have ever done. It's just very good. A breakout performance, regardless of how much of it is who they're in the ring with.
- Tucker does a great spinning back suplex, and halfway misses a moonsault. WOW.
- Otis catches Rowan in midair and World's Strongest Slams him!
- Bryan flies off the top with a knee to Otis, but Tucker cracks him.
- Tucker Knight FLIES OFF THE TOP ROPE TO THE OUTSIDE onto Rowan. WOAH.
- Bryan beats Tucker with a small package for the win.
- Heavy Machinery, Rowan and Daniel Bryan just blew the roof off the Tacoma Dome.
Smackdown Women's Championship
Bayley (c) defeated Alexa Bliss (w/ Nikki Cross)
- Alexa Bliss is backstage buttering up Nikki Cross. Cross says she's excited to be in Bliss' corner tonight.
- Alexa looks like she's transformed herself physically. She's only had to work 27 matches in the last 8 months.
- This is not exactly the barnburner pace of other matches on the show, but it's still solid work.
- Alexa gets a big pop after slapping Bayley.
- Another match, another "lay that shit in there" scenario. Not a problem for Bayley.
- Bliss pulls Bayley into the steel post.
- They go through the Britt Baker Special into a tilt-a-whirl, but Bayley gets a Bayley-to-Back suplex.
- Bayley's sunset flip buckle bomb looks better every week.
- Bayley meant to suicide dive Bliss, but gets Nikki instead. Alexa takes advantage with a Code Red on the floor.
- Nikki goes after Bayley, which gives Bayley enough time to get the knees up on Twisted Bliss.
- Bayley-To-Belly and a win.
- This was good too.
Roman Reigns defeated Drew McIntyre (w/ Shane McMahon)
- Reigns and Drew go right at it, and it results in a big dive from Reigns.
- Reigns chases Shane through the crowd, but gets caught with a McIntyre punch when flying over the barricade.
- Drew slows it down, and Shane McMahon keeps getting involved. This leads to a McIntyre spinebuster into a bridging pin.
- McIntyre applies a great surfboard crab and the Iron Maiden. Later, he does a crazy BammaSlamma to the announce table and follows it up with an East River Crossing for two.
- Reigns' offensive performance isn't as inspired as McIntyre's, which is a bit of a change of pace.
- Reigns does connect with a Superman punch to a flying McIntyre. A spear hits, but Shane drags the referee out of the ring.
- Roman has to lean in to help Shane connect on the Coast to Coast. Probably time to stop having Shane do that, then.
- Why didn't the ref DQ Drew by now? Either way, Reigns wins with a spear.
- Shane and Drew are livid backstage. There's a handicap match tomorrow night. Okay then.
Steel Cage Match
Kofi Kingston (c) defeated Dolph Ziggler to retain
- Both men go for their signature kicks early and miss.
- About five minutes in and we're getting a house show cage match.
- This is all boots and dropkicks.
- The first good spot comes like nine minutes into the match with a Kofi flying cross body.
- Kofi has a great, high velocity SOS.
- Ziggler applies an ankle lock, but Kofi climbs out of it and eats a superkick. Kofi almost falls out of the cage.
- Ziggler lands a Zig Zag for two, but this match is a snoozer.
- Ziggler goes to crawl out of the ropes, and Kofi jumps over him and wins.
- This was not good.
WWE Universal Championship
Special Ref: Lacey Evans
Seth Rollins (c) defeated Baron Corbin to retain the title
- Realistically, Corbin should pick Charlotte Flair as the special ref. I mean, is Rollins gonna beat her up? Instead, it's Lacey Evans.
- Corbin beats Rollins down with a steel chair.
- "This is stupid" and "AEW" chants for the Lacey Evans ref decision. "CM Punk" is next. Is this the heat everyone keeps telling me about that Corbin gets? "Boring" and "Daniel Bryan" are next.
- Corbin works over Rollins with a ripcord slam, superplex, uppercut and does the old plodding big man deal.
- Rollins fights back with a big series of strikes, but Lacey Evans does a slow count. So apparently that superkick would have beaten Corbin otherwise.
- Rollins powerbombs Corbin through the announce table and Lacey stops counting at 8 and tells Mike Rome that there are no countouts in this match.
- Corbin stops suicide dives with some great chokeslams, but it's good for a two count.
- Rollins fights back and does a great frog splash. Lacey Evans pretends her arm is hurt, though.
- Why did Lacey announce that there are no DQs? She could have just not called for the DQ for Corbin like she's done all night. That does nothing but help Rollins.
- Speaking of, Rollins does a Falcon Arrow onto the chair. No count.
- Lacey Evans slaps Rollins and punches him right in the penis. End of Days lands.
- Becky Lynch beats the shit out of Lacey Evans, who she has already beaten twice in actual matches. Referees pull Becky off.
- John Cone is the new ref and Corbin isn't happy.
- Rollins reverses End of Days and wins with a Curb Stomp.
- Rollins and Becky embrace to end the show.
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5.The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!