Moment Of Bliss
You should already know this segment is going to be goofy, ridiculous shit. Orton has to play the straight man here to Alexa Bliss being the creepy "warning signal." The Fiend pops up, and when the lights come on, Orton has Alexa Bliss in his arms. The Fiend seems rather arsed about this and wants Orton to hand her over. That sneaky SNEK Orton really showed the Fiend who was boss. It's nice to see the tables turned a bit here.
Symphony of Destruction
Jeff Hardy defeated Elias
5/10
R-Truth is hiding in a piano and some of the 24/7 dorks get beaten up by Hardy and Elias with guitars. I want WWE to keep the 24/7 title. I just want them to stop being so lazy about it. It's been the same bit for over a year. Tom Phillips says that the ref is being lenient by allowing a rope break. A No DQ match doesn't mean you can pin someone outside the ring. A rope break or "breaking the plane" of the ropes is considered outside the ring. HOWEVER, THIS WAS A FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH. THERE ARE NO ROPE BREAKS. By the way there are drumsets, and a cello used. At one point Elias busts Hardy's ass with a guitar in the middle of Whisper in the Wind. I've been watching Jeff Hardy doing Swantons for over 20 years, and that was one of the crazier ones. Off the ring post, through a table, right next to the stairs.
Slapjack (w/ Retribution) defeated Ricochet
5/10
Ali cuts a promo on Ricochet trying to talk some sense into him, and saying he's been used and abused by WWE like the rest of Retribution. WWE has a way of making you forget how incredible some of their talent is, and Ricochet is one of the finest examples. Dana Brooke shows up and slaps Ali. Retribution took out the entire roster earlier this year, but has trouble with Ricochet. Slapjack gets a win with a high velocity belly-to-back suplex that looked really great. This was too much bullshit and gaga for two guys who are talented enough to not need it.
Lana & Asuka defeated Shayna and Nia Jax
4.5/10
Why is this match happening? Why isn't it for the title? Nia and Shayna aren't on the same page and one of the first things Nia does is run herself through the ropes. I think we're past due to get Nia a little work with coaches. I think Lana is a better worker than Nia Jax at this point in their careers. That speaks to Lana's improvement and Nia's lack thereof. Baszler has the Kirafuda Clutch on, and Asuka hits Baszler with a knee and Shayna gets pinned. Again, this not being a title match was stupid. The match was fine, the booking associated was ignorant. I don't have a problem with Lana getting a pin that way, the match happening with no stakes was stupid. I have no idea why WWE are so obsessed with protecting Nia and not pin her.
Cedric Alexander (w/ The Hurt Business) defeated Xavier Woods (w/ Kofi Kingston)
5.75/10
New Day show us videos of them feuding with Hurt Business, as if we could forget. Then MVP comes up with some weird explanation for this feud. I'm all good with Hurt Business/New Day continuing because I don't want it to end on whatever weird stuff that was last week, and they have great chemistry. I just want Hurt Business to beat another team along the way between getting a bunch of matches with the champs. The suicide dive reversal that sent Alexander into the barricade was really good. Lumbar Check out of nowhere gets a clean pin. Cedric Alexander has some of the best offense in wrestling. They tease dissension, as Cedric celebrates on his own.
They have turned Matt Riddle's promos into the neighbor kid from Home Alone who is bugging the shuttle drivers before they leave Kevin behind. Omos knowing the name of Riddle's rabbit was hilarious, and he has a turtle named Hoppy.
Cedric Alexander (w/ The Hurt Business) defeated Xavier Woods (w/ Kofi Kingston) 5.75/10
New Day show us videos of them feuding with Hurt Business, as if we could forget. Then MVP comes up with some weird explanation for this feud. I'm all good with Hurt Business/New Day continuing because I don't want it to end on whatever weird stuff that was last week, and they have great chemistry. I just want Hurt Business to beat another team along the way between getting a bunch of matches with the champs. The suicide dive reversal that sent Alexander into the barricade was really good. Lumbar Check out of nowhere gets a clean pin. Cedric Alexander has some of the best offense in wrestling. They tease dissension, as Cedric celebrates on his own.
Top Contender Tournament Finals AJ Styles (w/ Omos) defeated Riddle and Keith Lee 6.25/10
They have turned Matt Riddle's promos into the neighbor kid from Home Alone who is bugging the shuttle drivers before they leave Kevin behind. Omos knowing the name of Riddle's rabbit was hilarious, and he has a turtle named Hoppy. The match itself was as good as you'd expect, and really highlighted Matt Riddle in a variety of ways. He's never off, and never seems out of place in the match. The teases of him powerbombing Lee, and Lee suplexing out of a Styles Clash (on Riddle) were excellent spots. Production didn't do Riddle and Styles any favors by staying on the latter as he awaited the Phenomenal Forearm.
Backstage after the match, Lashley and MVP attacked Riddle. This is the direction for the next program.
Dana Brooke defeated Reckoning (w/ Mustafa Ali) N/A Short
Reckoning is wrestling without her mask. She gets pinned in a pretty quick match with Dana Brooke. Well, then. Ali yells at Reckoning after the match. Ali hasn't been paying much attention to Retribution if he says there's no failure in Retribution.
Drew McIntyre & Sheamus defeated Miz & Morrison via DQ. 5/10
Miz says "Money in the Brank." Ha haaa! An accident, pal. Basically Miz and Morrison make fun of Sheamus and beat him up with a briefcase. Sheamus and Drew joke about it backstage after. AJ Styles tells Miz and Morrison he'll help them tonight because Miz is an easier out than Drew. Keith Lee tells Sheamus a lot of people think he's turning on Drew. AJ Styles joins commentary and is pretty hilarious. He causes a DQ by hitting Drew McIntyre, so he can help Miz cash in. I love Styles helping Miz. It makes all the sense in the world. Skull Crushing Finale and Starship Pain hit on Drew, but Miz looks like a doofus not cashing in immediately. Drew disposes of Miz & Morrison and Styles escapes. A rare main event DQ finish that makes sense.
