Open
Edge comes out apparently just to say that he's going to stop talking and make his decision. This very much feels like a kayfabe "contractual obligation." Roman Reigns interrupts, but Edge says he knows the reason Reigns is after him is so he can guarantee a main event for his own ego. Sami Zayn shows up and gets kicked by Jey Uso. Roman Reigns gets into Edge's ear and whispers something that we don't hear.
Shinsuke Nakamura defeated Apollo Crews
5/10
Angle 8/10
Apollo Crews cuts a promo about Big E dismissing and disrespecting him. I love Big E just saying "I beat him three times in six weeks. no!" about Crews. Big E even in character reiterating that wins and losses matter, while Cole is like "YEAH, BUT HE'S ATHLETIC!!" Nakamura ends up cradling Crews for the pin. Crews attacks Nakamura, and Big E stops him. Crews turns heel and attacks both men, including Big E with the stairs. They're a psychotic spot where Apollo drops stairs over the top rope onto Big E, this was a great use of the camera angles they're provided without the crowd around. They've made Apollo Crews more interesting. Now make him WIN! Matches! Lots of them!!
Seth Rollins
Ah, a legal action storyline. Seth Rollins says months went into planning his return. He cut an extensive promo that seems a little too Messiah-esque. He blames all the losers, especially Cesaro, for ruining his special night. Hey, if we're getting this program, I'm all on board.
Backstage Cesaro said he and everyone else were out there out of respect hoping that Rollins would return as a leader instead of the same smug SOB that left.
Tamina & Natalya defeated Riott Squad
4.75/10
WWE has put honest to god time into their women's tag team division of late. I love it. Tamina and Natalya seem like an honest to god team. Billie Kay comes out dressed in Natalya and Tamina's gear. This leads to Tamina hitting a really good looking Gunnslinger slam for the win. This is the best Tamina has looked in ages. She superkicks Billie Kay after the match for celebrating with them.
DING DONG, HELLO!
Ding Dong Hello is what I came to see. Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler actually ring the doorbell. They actually all talk about how good it is that Sasha Banks and Bayley split. Reginald comes out and won't use the door. Time to cancel Reginald for refusing to ring the doorbell. Bayley needs to press charges against Reginald. She did not invite him into the house. He didn't ring the doorbell! Neither did Sasha. Wow. Bianca joins, but Reginald wants them to team up against Nia, Shayna and Bayley. This is amazing. Bayley screams at everyone to use the door bell.
Reginald, Sasha Banks & Bianca Belair defeated Nia Jax, Shayna Baszler & Bayley
5/10
Bayley wrestling in her Ding Dong, Hello clothes is great. Nia Jax beats the living shit out of Reginald, who can't do a drop toe hold to her. Nia catches Reginald, but Bianca and Shayna dropkick him onto her. Reginald wins! Reginald wins! Reginald wins! I don't see why Nia sold that as her being "out" instead of being "pinned."
Nia & Shayna vs. Bianca Belair & Sasha Banks was announced for Elimination Chamber.
Backstage, Carmella isn't happy about what Reginald was up to.
The Mysterios defeated Team Alpha via DQ
SQUASH
Dominik is finally wrestling someone besides Murphy, Rollins or Corbin, and he looks good. Otis uses a World's Strongest Slam and a Big Splash. The ref DQs Team Alpha for breaking the ref's count rules. The beat down continues. I was just thinking how babyface heavy the tag division is.
Daniel Bryan, Kevin Owens & Cesaro defeated Sami Zayn, King Corbin, & Jey Uso
5.5/10
Edge speaks with Kevin Owens, and they seem to get along and have respect for each other. Not so much for King Corbin, who brags about how rich he is. There are interactions with all of the participants throughout the night. Edge tells Bryan he motivated him to get his career back. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't remember The Ultimate Opportunist being as much about mental games as I remember it being about taking advantage of a situation. Edge keeps bringing up the mental games.
Daniel Bryan and Cesaro troll Kevin Owens for turning on everyone. They say they're forgetting a big name, and maybe they should have made a LIST.
Cesaro struggles with a swing on Cesaro at one point. Cesaro was like "I'm not letting my Swing look like that, we're doing this again." This match is outstanding, and Edge and Paul Heyman join commentary. Daniel Bryan ends up winning the match by pinning Sami Zayn after a magnificent double arm superplex into the Yes Lock. But you know the drill.
Everyone comes in and hits their finishes, but Edge spears Jey Uso. Roman Reigns spears Edge, and stands tall to end the show.
Rating Guide
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!
