INTRO
Pat McAfee is introduced as a former NXT Superstar. Roman Reigns is out with Jey Uso and Paul Heyman, and gloats about his win and how he won at WrestleMania. I want Jey Uso to bring his damn trophy out all the time, too. Either way, Reigns says he fulfilled his obligation tonight and is ready to leave. Cesaro comes out, and gets face-to-face, but Reigns just leaves. There's a lot of built in story here between Cesaro and Heyman. There have been two Reigns vs. Cesaro one-on-one matches ever -- one was a 20 minute world title tournament match (2015), the other was a 17 minute Intercontinental Title match (2017). Both were on Raw.
Paul Heyman is backstage and says that tonight, they're going to give Cesaro what he wants. Tonight, he gets a main event against the "main event".....Jey Uso.
They show the fucking Rollins/Cesaro clip a hundred times. I'm sure they'll do that as a reason Rollins is pissed off. I found this HILARIOUS.
Jey Uso cuts a promo on Cesaro, as well.
Rey Mysterio (w/ Dominik) defeated Otis (w/ Chad Gable)
5.25/10
Well, Rey isn't going to have a bad match. Otis is a great contrast for him, and this is a solid television match. There's a good World's Strongest Slam, that I love Otis using. Rey Mysterio gets the victory after a flying crucifix. Otis won't get enough credit for keeping his shoulders on the mat and making this look convincing and credible. That's not easy.
Kevin Owens defeated Sami Zayn defeated countout
5/10
Sami Zayn comes out and demands a rematch with Kevin Owens and gets one. My hope is that as things progress Kevin Owens sees evidence that Sami Zayn is telling the truth and actually isn't crazy and sides with him. Zayn does a sunset flip powerbomb, Owens a superkick, and Zayn takes a countout. Well okay.
BIANCA CELEBRATION
Bianca Belair comes out to join Street Profits for a very emotional, inspirational speech. She lightly threatens Sasha Banks, and says she's just getting started making history. Bayley does a promo after Bianca backstage and says she was crying because she couldn't actually believe she was winning. Bayley should probably mention she's beaten Bianca.
WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championships
Dirty Dawgs (c) defeated Street Profits
6/10
We already know this is going to be a good match. I love that Street Profits worked to get back to this. It's a total babyface move. The pace is fast, and this plays to the strengths of both teams. A fantastic match, and Ziggler and Roode get the win with a Zig Zag. This seemed like an easy way to get a special moment for Montez Ford and Bianca Belair, instead of pinning Montez a week after they DIDN'T GIVE THEM A WRESTLEMANIA MATCH. Oh well. I'm sure they'll get the titles back next week. McAfee was so excited he stood up.
Other stuff.
Apollo Crews is with COMMANDER AZEEZ and says the Nigerian spike is the reason Big E isn't there tonight.
Natalya (w/ Tamina) defeated Shayna Baszler (w/ Nia Jax)
4/10
Pat McAfee is such a natural, shit stirring color commentator. Not even heel. Just good at agitating the play by play guy. Cole no sells some of Pat's lines. Then Natalya rolls up Shayna Baszler. Okay. Tamina boots Nia Jax because this has to continue and there are four teams.
Cesaro defeated Jey Uso via DQ
5.75/10
They got Main Event Jey Uso his Andre win, so back to the main event! He controls early, before Cesaro takes over with impressive offense. Standing dropkick to the top rope, gutwrench superplex. Corkscrew European uppercut is back. Prettiest move in wrestling. We see Uso do a throwing neckbreaker here, so he's going above and beyond to innovate, too.
Seth Rollins runs in and causes a DQ. I don't think Rollins running in and briefly attacking was a main event payoff for the 30342390324 replay clips we saw.
Rating Guide
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!
