NJPW G1 SPECIAL NIGHT 2
KUSHIDA, Jushin Liger & Finlay defeated Sho Tanaka, Yohei Komatsu & Yoshi Tatsu
- The crowd is hot, and into the ref.
- KUSHIDA is a very special worker.
- Jim Ross calls Tempura the Teriyaki Boyz. The commentary is terrible right now.
- Tanaka had a sweet double wristlock reversal with Komatsu. SICK
- Babyfaces win.
Kenny Omega defeated Jay Lethal
United States Title Tournament
- Omega boots Lethal and attacks his ribs after trying to ease off of him.
- These two get RIGHT into it.
- Kenny Omega does something different every match. A move, a sell, something.
- Lethal hits his finish early, which gets him right back into the match. How does that move make sense?
- Omega wins a damn good match.
- A good story that Omega was facing a hampered Lethal
Tomohiro Ishii defeated Zack Sabre
United States Title Tournament
- Sabre tries to trade with Ishii and gets his ass kicked with one punch.
- They're just beating the tar out of each other.
- A nice mix of strong strikes and submission attempts. Incredible struggle to get to the ropes.
- Ishii gets the win.
Juice Robinson, Jay White, Dragon Lee, Titan & Volador Jr. defeated Los Ingobernables
- "That'll make your brown eye blue" - Barnett after a kick to the ass
- Juice Robinson screams for his opponent to "suck it" mid Russian leg sweep. Added a point to my score of the match.
- Dragon Lee and Takahashi SLAP THE SHIT out of each other.
- Good stuff to finish this. I would have had LIJ go over here though.
Bullet Club (Adam Page w/ Guerrillas of Destiny) (w/ Haku) defeated Michael Elgin & War Machine
- Haku is here with Bullet Club!!!
- All of these 6-10 man tags are pretty good.
- Adam Page gets chucked around between Elgin and War Machine. It rules.
- JR is trying to force an "Everybody doesn't love Raymond" line. It's been rough.
- Roa doesn't sell anything.
- Page picks up the win, because they wanna make that happen real bad.
- NJPW announces a 2018 return. Probably should have made that the fall of 2017.
IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championship
Young Bucks (c) vs. Roppongi Vice
- This is going up against the Slammiversary X Division match. Poor GFW.
- A much slower pace than I'd expect.
- An Inverted More Bang For Your Buck, and Trent kicks out because he kicks out of everything.
- Ya boy can't get behind kicking out of an apron piledriver, running knee and another piledriver within 25 seconds. Nick Jackson had stood up before even being thrown in the ring. A kickout after Strong Zero, too.
- Meltzer Driver onto the floor. They hit another in the ring.
- Nice tribute to Dave Meltzer by the Bucks. They win. I didn't like the match.
- Ricochet comes out and takes out the Bucks! Great ovation!
- Ricochet rips a Rock promo and says LU have been pricks. Oh.
- Roppongi Vice split after the match.
Bullet Club defeated CHAOS
- I don't know if all the 6-10 man tags will hold the interest of the American.
- Scurll actually slaps his own leg for an Ospreay kick. Huh.
- The Briscoes are captivating, per usual. Same with Okada.
- Jay obliterated Takahashi with a sick discus forearm.
- Bullet Club win and Cody really endears himself to them. I'm loving this story.
IWGP Intercontinental Championship
Hiroshi Tanahashi (c) defeated Billy Gunn
- Billy Gunn is gonna beat Tanahashi, walk through through the curtain and take one of Haku's eyes.
- Cool to see Gunn adapting and working Tanahashi's injured right arm instead of the standard left.
- Tanahsahi pulls Gunn's pants down. Gunn does the same. Asses out errywhere.
- Gunn gave it everything he had and pulled all of this old tricks out of his book. Tanahashi won after throwing a "suck it."
United States Championship Tournament Finals
Kenny Omega (w/ Young Bucks) defeated Tomohiro Ishii
- JR arguing for the wrong pronunciation of Ishii.
- Outstanding first series of near hits and misses.
- They go into the crowd. This ends up being way slower paced than usual.
- Omega hits a psychotic tope con hilo and Ishii cracks his head on the floor. Luckily he's OK.
- Omega follows up with the grossest looking missile dropkick I've ever seen.
- I don't like Barnett using the term "this is a work" in the match, even if he's referring to Young Bucks working the refs.
- Omega tries an apron Dragon suplex, but Ishii holds on to the ropes with his TEETH.
- OMEGA HITS THE SUPLEX! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
- Ishii DDT's out of a One Winged Angel.
- There are a lot, lot, lot of 2.9's. Ishii landed a One Winged Angel of his own, and I thought it was over.
- Ishii kicks out at one after a knee!!
- ONE WINGED ANGEL! Omega wins!
- Cody Rhodes comes out and teases a split, but hugs Omega.
Braxton Sutter, Allie & Mahabali Shera defeated Kongo Kong, KM, Laurel Van Ness
- At least Allie and Laurel got on the show.
- Mahabali Shera sucks so, so bad.
- It's good to hear Don West again.
- Half of the people in this match scream "don't care about me, please."
- Kongo Kong is a really agile dude.
GFW/Impact Tag Team Championships
LAX defeated Team AAA, Team CRASH and Team Japan
- Good move to put this as the show opener. It's sure to be good.
- Early on we see about three "C'MON AND HIT ME" spots. Okay.
- Some of these guys seem to have trouble adjusting to the ring.
- Sweet Death Valley Driver from Ortiz.
- Fantasma has one of the laziest pins I've ever seen.
- LAX hit a convoluted but cool sitdown powerbomb/reverse neckbreaker.
- This match is a mess. It should have been good, but there were repeated botches and errors and convoluted moves that didn't need to happen.
- This match on Slammiversary shouldn't still be happening. GO HOME. It's too far gone.
- They don't care. Diamante gets flipped onto a group.
- Another "CMON. LETS TRADE" spot in this opening match. Yikes
- Diamante screwed up her knee and she's still doing spots. This is a wreck.
- LAX win. It's amazing how something could have so many amazing spots and be so bad.
Moose & D'Angelo Williams defeated Chris Adonis & Eli Drake
- Adonis towers over Eli Drake. Sometimes I forget how tall he is.
- Moose gets a full cheerleader entrance. Pretty cool.
- D'Angelo Williams just did a cannonball on Eli Drake.
- Eli Drake hit a powerslam on Moose that was way more impressive than I can explain.
- D'Angelo Williams isn't doing half bad.
- So far, D'Angelo Williams had the best match at Slammiversary. He looked good.
EC3 defeated James Storm
- EC3 has that pape tan!
- EC3 keeps trying to powder out, but he's stuck to Storm. Kind of cool.
- Impact has started to implement the zoom cam. Don't do that. It's dumb.
- You don't notice the strap until you need to, which is cool.
- EC3 has handcuffs too, but Storm handcuffs him!! I think EC3 told Storm to eat his ass.
- My god. Storm hit EC3 with the strap like 32 times.
- EC3 gets unlocked, unstrapped, and pulls Storm into the ring post.
- EC3 and Storm trade big moves, and Storm is out. EC3 wins.
Joseph Park & Jeremy Borash defeated Scott Steiner & Josh Mathews
- Good, Glad to see the Pope.
- Mathews did a horrible Disaster Kick and a terrible chain wrestling series.
- Josh Mathews just did a huge dive. Wrestling like a babyface.
- Steiner is trying to run over JB and Park while screaming at them and calling them fatasses.
- JB and Park sprayed tapioca on Steiner and Matthews out of a fire estinguisher. This kicks ass.
- This is filmed like the Deletion.
- Jeremy Borash back body drops Mathews into the pool AND HITS A SWANTON! LOL!
- JB AND MATHEWS ARE FIGHTING UNDERWATER AND FREAKING SHARK BOY SHOWS UP.
- FATHER JAMES FREAKING MITCHELL IS HERE AND GIVES PARK THE ABYSS MASK. I HAVE CHILLS!!
- They're back at ringside, Shark Boy gets beat up, but Abyss is here!
- Josh Mathews got Black Hole Slammed onto Thumbtacks! Then JB hit a frog splash. That RULED
Full Metal Mayhem
Eddie & Alisha Edwards vs. Davey Richards & Angelina Love
- Alisha Edwards with a wild dive after Eddie attacks Davey!
- How does one hold someone's mouth OPEN? C'mon.
- Tacks in two straight matches because there are no agents.
- Alisha sunset flip bombs Love off a ladder through table! Edwards does the same to Richards to little reaction.
Sonjay Dutt (c) defeated Low Ki
Two out of Three falls
- Low Ki wrestling in a suit is the dumbest shit.
- He gets the first fall, but he still looks like he's making an entrance in that suit. Jesus.
- This isn't bad, but this isn't Low Ki and Sonjay of 2004-2007.
- No reaction for this match.
- Dutt lands a beautiful Asai Moonsault.
- Remember that dumb X-Division rule that every match had to be a multi-man?
- Dutt wins the match. It was ok.
Double Title Match
Sienna (GFW) defeated Rosemary (Impact)
- KM and Laurel Van Ness are causing problems for Sienna early on until she banishes them.
- By the way, Rosemary's entrance was cool.
- Sienna gnaws on Rosemary's thumb. Cool.
- Sienna does not wrestle her size.
- Rosemary lands a nice Spider suplex on Sienna, who takes it well.
- Rosemary kicks out of Sienna's finish, and Rosemary does the "I can't believe it" look.
- Laurel is back again, and gets chased off by Allie. Belt shot on Rosemary. Rosemary kicks out. See above.
- Sienna win.
GFW vs. Impact Title
Alberto El Patron (GFW) (w/ Dos Caras) defeated Bobby Lashley (IMPACT) (w/ King Mo)
- Lashley and El Patron are beating the turds out of each other.
- Dos Caras does a horrible chop to King Mo, who does an even more horrible sell.
- The ten punch in the corner spot needs to die.
- Super Attitude Adjustment from Lashley.
- Both men take a sick tumble to the outside.
- Dos Caras just kicked King Mo right in the penis
- Lashley has to hold on to the top rope while AEP does his dumb stomp. AEP wins.