Rating guide
10- Perfect, 9- Excellent, 8- Great, 7- Good, 6- Above Average, 5- Average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system.
Loser is first to enter Elimination Chamber
John Cena defeated The Miz
6.25/10
- John Cena comes out and says that he has to win at Elimination Chamber, alluding to the fact that he wants his 17th championship victory.
- The Miz comes out and burns John Cena a few times, who says he'd have no chance against Brock Lesnar.
- John Cena challenges Miz, but the Miztourage lay him out. Then Miz accepts. Kurt Angle comes out and says the loser will be the Elimination Chamber's first entrant, and kicks Miztourage out.
- The Miz controls the majority of the early going, but Cena hits a pretty ugly tornado DDT.
- We come back from a commercial to Cena applying an STF to The Miz.
- Miz works his way out, eats an AA and kicks out!!
- Michael Cole just called the Yes Lock, a very clear spot to get a reaction a particular way, an STF.
- Miz gets out, hits Skull Crushing Finale for two. Super AA gets the win. Excellent last segment of the match, and Cena gives his armband to a fan after the match.
The Revival defeated The Good Brothers
5.5/10
- We see a NERD-O-METER backstage.
- The Revival take out Balor Club's knees on the way down the ramp.
- Our fourth Balor Club/Revival match since Raw 25.
- Good Brothers throw down a good ass kicking that included Dash taking a great bump when being tossed outside.
- The Revival go back to working over the knee of Gallows until a superkick.
- Karl Anderson hot tags are kind of fun. He has a wonderful spinebuster per usual.
- Gallows dropped across the steps, and Anderson eats Shatter Machine.
Angle and Rollins
- Kurt Angle comes out and is rough on the mic. He announces Ronda Rousey is signing her WWE contract at Elimination Chamber -- to a bunch of boos.
- He announces Jason Jordan is out of WrestleMania after neck surgery -- which gets a lot of cheers. He admonishes the crowd for doing this.
- Seth Rollins comes out and sympathizes with Jordan, but says he wants a shot at Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania. Angle offers him another tag team partner. Rollins says no, but gains a spot in the last chance qualifier tonight.
Backstage crappenings
- Bray Wyatt spooky promo. Per usual. He complains about Matt Hardy.
- The Bar say Rollins' old tag team partners are bonding in rehab over how bad he is. Reigns makes fun of Cesaro's braces. Then Reigns indicates he's going to beat up Sheamus
- Titus hypes Apollo Crews up before the qualifier. This is the most personality we've been allowed to see out of Apollo.
- Alexa Bliss says she's jealous of Mickie James and that's why she says all the mean things about her. Vince is really pushing the Biscuit Butt deal.
- We get some weird phone promos
Bayley defeated Sasha Banks
6.25/10
- Bayley has a nice counter of Sasha's corner knees after having her shoulder worked over well.
- Bayley hits a clothesline hard. I really hate to place blame or wish someone out of a job, but my enjoyment for WWE programming will significantly increase when Kevin Dunn is gone #WWEStopTheZoom.
- Side suplex from Bayley looks great, too. She's also one of the best in WWE at the running kicks.
- Bayley misses a flying elbow drop and gets put in the Banks Statement. Good on Coach pointing out Sasha isn't supposed to be allowed to leverage the ropes continuously.
- A Super Bayley to Belly wins it!
- A turn is teased, but Bayley saves Sasha from Nia Jax. Nia's new hair is cool, and a hometown girl can't win and keep her heat.
Absolution (w/ Paige) defeated Team Biscuit Butt
4.5/10
- Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville both scream future stars to me.
- Graves bringing up Deville's comfortability in a cage is great.
- Paige is screaming at Alexa Bliss, and Deville attacks. Paige is a natural in this role.
- Mandy Rose wins with Angel's Wings. This was really short.
New cello who dis
- Elias heels the crowd. Braun Strowman shows up on the stage with a cello. He beats up Elias and breaks it over Elias' back. It was really, really, really entertaining.
- Braun sings, gets a great crowd
Roman Reigns defeated Sheamus (w/ Cesaro)
6/10
- When Reigns cracks Sheamus in the face, Cesaro calls him "Sheamy."
- Reigns gets hit with one of the nastiest rolling sentons I've ever seen outside the ring, that leads to Sheamus working over Reigns.
- Son of a bee. That Superman Punch was SLICK when Sheamus went for a Brogue kick.
- Reigns effortlessly sitdown powerbombs Sheamus, but eats a gross looking pump knee after being distracted by Cesaro.
- Reigns hits Cesaro with a Superman punch and catches Sheamus off the top with a great Spear that looked nasty.
Elimination Chamber Qualifier
Seth Rollins and Finn Balor defeated Matt Hardy, Bray Wyatt, Apollo Crews
7.25/10
- I think Apollo Crews will have a chance to shine here. He cracks Wyatt with an apron moonsault.
- A zoom on a kip up. #WWEStopTheZoom. No teleprompters on Raw, Coach. Just a corny script and a man who qualifies for social security screaming in your ear.
- Bray goes on a hot streak with a rope hung jawbreaker and a uranage. He stops a Tower of Doom, which is good. He also kills Rollins with a clothesline.
- Hardy had to wait on Rollins a bit while going for Twist of Fate. Rollins flying clotheslines him instead. Then Seth hits a sweet double Blockbuster.
- Rollins misses a Phoenix, then Bray misses Sister Abigail, but Hardy catches Wyatt with Twist of Fate. Balor breaks it up with Coup de Grace, but eats a Curb Stomp from Rollins. Crews breaks up the pin.
- Wyatt gets Sister Abigail on Hardy outside the ring.
- Crews gets a fallaway Samoan drop and a standing moonsault on Rollins for two!
- A tower of doom spot ends in both Balor and Rollins getting a pin as we go off the air!
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