Welcome to the Live Coverage of
LUCHA UNDERGROUND
SEASON 3 PREMIERE
Here's what we've got in store this year:
And they're definitely starting us off with a bang.
Dario Cueto doing pull ups in his jail cell.
Guard comes in to let him out, says "You must have friends in high places."
Cueto: "You have no idea."
The guard who processes him out is played by The Honky Tonk Man.
He goes outside, gets in a limo with Councilman Lorenzo Llamas, who says the charges have been dropped.
THE CIGAR SMOKING SHADOW MAN is there too, he has a Dr. Claw glove, and he says in Spanish: "Waste my time again and your next sentence will be death."
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"We spread the word," says Cueto. "The Temple is back open."
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In the Temple, Dario announces the main event: REY MYSTERIO vs PENTAGON DARK,
Also, he announces his new concept: Dario's Dial of Doom.
There are names on a big wheel, and who ever the wheel lands on, that person is "doomed" to face his brother Matanza Cueto.
He spins the wheel and it lands on SON OF HAVOC.
The match starts immediately.
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SON OF HAVOC vs MATANZA
Son of Havoc puts up a good fight, cartwheeling and dropkicking and elbow dropping Matanza in the nuts.
But Matanza is just too strong, throwing Havoc all over the ring and landing a couple of Standing Moonsault Headbutts.
Havoc tries for a tornado DDT, but Matanza ain't going anywhere. So Havoc just locks in a Guillotine Choke for a while, then a giant double stomp from the top rope.
Matanza kicks out and Havoc lands perfectly into a cross armbreaker. Matanza picks him up, and Havoc gets out of it.
He goes up for the 450, but Matanza moves. Havoc rolls through, and Matanza catches him in the Wrath of the Gods, which is the most Non-Kickout-able move in LU.
WINNER: Matanza
Damn. I forgot how hard it is to do Live Coverage of Lucha Underground. I can't type fast enough to keep up.
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Inside Cueto's office.
The Worldwide Underground (Johnny Mundo, Jack Evans and PJ Black, along with Taya.
He demands a title shot.
But Dario says you lost the Trios Titles, you're a loser.
Johnny says "only because of Angelico, but we took care of him" and there is a FLASHBACK to all of Worldwide Underground jumping Angelico and crushing his leg in a car door.
Wow.
Back in the office, and everyone is laughing about the story, including Dario.
He's like "that's hilarious, but you still don't get a title match."
Then let me fight Sexy Star for the Gift of the Gods title, says Johnny.
Nope says Dario. The only one of you who didn't lose that Trios match is Taya. She gets to face Sexy Star for the GotG belt.
Johnny is angry.
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Ivellisse in the ring now.
She's pissed at Catrina for costing her the match at Ultima Lucha.
She calls out Catrina, and Catrina materializes out of thin air in the darkness.
She accepts, and there's going to be a match, but not until next Ultima Lucha.
So like JUNE.
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Taya vs Sexy Star (c) for the GotG Championship
A whole bunch of wristlocking and chain wrestling to start.
Trading slaps until Taya takes control with a Thesz Press.
She's able to connect with the Andrade Almas knees in the corner, but only a two count.
Sexy Star fights back, hitting a Brogue Kick then a cannonball senton off the apron.
The rest of Worldwide Underground comes out, Jack and PJ distracting the ref while Johnny holds Sexy against the bottom rope.
Taya goes for her Andrade knees, but Sexy gets out of the way and Taya hits Johnny.
Sexy rolls up Taya for the victory.
WINNER: Sexy Star
After the match, they all beat down Sexy Star until the Trios Champs, Aerostar, Fenix & Drago run in to make the save.
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Dario's office again.
Marty the Moth comes in. They exchange pleasantries until Moth gets down to business.
He wants to conquer the Temple.
Dario says he has to go through Killshot first, put the feud for the dog tags behind him.
Next week will be the first ever Weapons of Mass Destruction Match.
Everything will be legal.
Can't wait.
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REY MYSTERIO JR vs PENTAGON DARK
Mysterio hits a hurricanrana and a tope con hiro to the outside.
Pentagon reverses an irish whip and pancakes Rey in the middle of the ring.
A huge slap to the chest from Pentagon followed by two Sling Blades and a superkick.
Pentagon goes up top, impeded by Rey. Rey hits a springboard Frankensteiner.
Two Count.
Pentagon sends Rey through the bottom rope to the outside on his belly.
Rey hits a mule kick from on the apron to Pentagon's face, then a flying hurricanrana headscissors.
Back in the ring.
Pentagon hits A WICKED CRAZY PACKAGE DRIVER. TWO COUNT.
My god.
MY GOD.
Rey goes for the 619, Pentagon ducks, hits a another huge superkick.
Then a GORILLA PRESS TO GUTBUSTER.
TWO COUNT.
Pentagon taunts his former master Vampiro from in the ring.
Vampiro gets up from his commentary position and walks out.
Rey Mysterio hits a Sunset Flip Piledriver for the 1-2-3.
WINNER: Rey Mysterio
After the match, Pentagon beats down Mysterio and is about to break his arm, but Dragon Azteca runs in for the save.
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Prince Puma sits alone in the locker room. Flashbacks show him reflecting on his loss to Mysterio last year.
Vampiro comes in and offers some advice.
Puma doesn't want to hear it.
Can't wait to see where this goes.
