DOUCHED OUT
- Well if you wondered if Brock was going to be able to do WrestleMania, there he is.
- It feels like much more of a skeleton crew for this Raw, and I already like how it is being shot and how it looks more.
- Did Paul Heyman just say Drew McIntyre is going to get douched out? Well then. He says Drew will be another bitch who tried.
- That was noteworthy at least.
- We get a full hour of retread bullshit after this. This does not work.
AJ Styles
- AJ Styles is with the OC on the stage.
- He jokes about Michelle McCool letting Undertaker out of the house and him wearing maternity pants.
- Tiger King reference.
- Styles rambles on about this video of Undertaker playing with Tigers.
- AJ Styles says this will be a Boneyard Match. The fuck is that?
- He says he'll put Taker in the plot his wife picked out.
Garzandrade (w/ Zelina) defeated Cedric Alexander & Ricochet
7/10
- Zelina cuts a promo about her team, and it was fine.
- There are still way too many camera cuts on this show.
- Garza and Andrade attack Ricochet, but Cedric makes the save.
- Garza tries to physically move the tag rope.
- Street Profits have to be the most meddling team of all-time. They just always show up. They're always there.
- Montez Ford is not nearly loud enough on commentary,
- Garzandrade do a nice sunset flip into a knee.
- This is so hard hitting and good, maybe the best audienceless match WWE has had so far.
- Zelina, Street Profits and commentary are really adding to this. Plus the fact that there are four wrestlers.
- A double powerbomb hits for Garzandrade, but Ricochet gets taken out.
- Garza does a second rope moonsault.
- Cedric has the best Michinoku Driver around.
- Andrade cracked Cedric with a big back elbow. Cedric kicks out after the three and gets checked on by the ref.
- Street Profits come to the ring, and Andrade & Garza takes the titles and run off.
Street Profits defeated Brendan Vink & Shane Thorne
5/10
- Brendan Vink has been in NXT working events for a bout a year, but hasn't wrestled on television once.
- Good on Shane Thorne getting some Raw exposure I guess. He does a nice Cannonball in the corner.
- Dawkins gets a good hot tag, Ford wins with a frog splash.
WWE 24/7 Championship
R-Truth defeated Riddick Moss (c) to become champion
- Why is a camera following Riddick Moss running?
- A ref pulls up in a car, and Truth pins him. These wrestlers look so week not getting their shoulders up.
Chairwoman
- Shayna Baszler makes a joke about biting after being a jerk to Charly Caruso.
- Baszler sounds like a villain revealing her evil plot to destroy Becky Lynch.
- Well, Becky Lynch comes out with a chair and destroys Shayna.
Aleister Black defeated Leon Ruff
SQUASH
- I actually like the silence at the beginning of this match.
- Aleister sits down. Leon Ruff tells him to get up.
- Ruff goes to kick Black, but misses and eats a Black Mass.
- This squash match ruled.
Owens and Rollins
- Kevin Owens has heard that Seth Rollins is here and wants to see him face-to-face.
- Rollins said the Performance Center is a great facility that was built on the back of his hard work.
- He was told everything he did before WWE didn't mean anything, Kevin Owens wasn't.
- He runs down his track record at WrestleMania, and how good he is there. It's true, he's won a match at every WrestleMania he's competed at.
- This was a great Rollins promo.
Charlotte
- We see Charlotte vs. Asuka.
- Charlotte says she thinks Rhea Ripley probably wants to emulate what she did to Asuka.
- She encourages Ripley to get a history lesson.
- Randy Orton says Edge isn't really a junkie for the crowd, he's a junkie for himself.
- Orton knows he got into WWE based on who he was, but wasn't handed his IC title. Edge was handed a torch by Mick Foley and Orton was thrown into thumbtacks.
- He loves Edge's family and tried to send their father back home.
- He accepts Edge's challenge.
Rating Guide
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!
