Cucking and stuff.
- We see a terrible video intro reminding us of the garbage angle from last Monday.
- They cut to Orton and King Corbin beating up Rusev in the ring.
- Lashley appears on the Titantron and he's at Rusev's house in his robe, and in his bed.
- She says that everything they own is in her name and they don't have joint checking accounts anymore.
- Yeah this is gonna do three million youtube views easy with a thumbnail of Lana unhooking her bra.
- Her accent is finally gone.
- Corbin and Orton are laughing at Rusev, and he beats their asses.
- Well, the crowd is behind Rusev after he throws Corbin into the stairs and Orton into the barricade.
- No King, buddy, most people can't relate to what's going on in Rusev's head right now
- Legit thought they were gonna have Lashley bare assed when he dropped that robe.
Last Woman Standing
Natalya defeated Lacey Evans
4.25/10
- Lacey cuts a promo on Natalya.
- The action is a little sloppy to start, but Natalya applies a Sharpshooter.
- Lacey heeling the crowd by not using the table was clever.
- Lacey slams Natalya into the ring post and the stairs.
- Natalya is locked in an office chair with a Kendo stick in a pretty neat spot. She ends up monkey flipping Lacey with the kendo stick.
- These stick spots are really awkward.
- Lacey empties a trash can on Natalya after throwing it at her, then does one of the worst WWE moonsaults in recent memory off the guard rail. It missed by a mile.
- Suplexes on the ramp and an announce table, and Natalya is thrown into the video boards.
- Natalya powerbombs Lacey off the stage through a table to win. At least the match was good.
- This one went about 17 minutes. The segment went about 20 minutes. If you watch the highlights, it'll be a good watch.
Backstage Crappenings
- Street Profits are here. They do a scouting report.
- Rey says he's proud of his son of taking a beating like a man. An awful lot of angles in WWE where the heel makes the babyface watch dastardly things unfold. Cain Velasquez visited them in the hospital. "The only man that can brag accurately that Brock Lesnar fears him" is a hell of a qualifier.
- We see another AOP vignette.
Viking Raiders defeated Ziggler & Roode
4.5/10
- Viking Raiders take over and get a good pop for the assisted slam.
- Jerry Lawler makes more Heart Stopper elbow jokes about Dolph Ziggler.
- The crowd doesn't give a shit about this now. Not at all. You could hear a pin drop in the arena.
- Erick is targeted after the break and the heels take advantage of a distraction. Ziggler DDTs Ivar on the floor.
- Erick takes out both heels. Ivar tags in and runs wild, but eats a Fameasser from Ziggler.
- Erick eats turnbuckle with his knees. He survives a Spinebuster/Zig Zag.
- The Viking Experience wins it.
- Why isn't this a tag team title match? Viking Raiders are 15-0 on Raw. What do they have to prove? Well they're getting a title match next week.
Aleister Black defeated The Bollywood Boyz
SQUASH
- MORE SPOOKY ALEISTER BLACK. He wants a fight. Later he says he's just gonna go out to the ring.
- Is this called "WWE Showcase?" They keep half-assed mentioning it.
- The Singh Bros. are out and call out Aleister Black. Ah boy.
- Head kick knocks one out. A combo wears down the other. Sunil is back and gets kicked.
- A Dragon Sleeper finishes the match. It was called "an innovative" submission. It's a Dragon Sleeper with a less practical grip.
The OC defeated Lucha House Party
5.25/10
- Kalisto sends AJ flying with armdrags, Lince sends Anderson with flying headscissors
- LHP hit their assisted splash onto The OC.
- Lucha House Party do in stereo moonsaults to everyone.
- Every time a wrestler gets their mask pulled on, WWE should have an announcer remind us of how important the mask is to the culture. Otherwise I'd completely forget.
- This match breaks down, and it's nasty.
- AJ counters a Salida Del Sol with a Pele and pins Kalisto with a Phenomenal Forearm.
- Magic Killer on Metalik after the match. Dorado eats a second rope Styles Clash.
Miz TV
- MIZ TV is up next, and we have Charlotte Flair and Becky Lynch on it.
- "Will they be able to coexist together here on MizTV?" WHAT,
- "Becky" chants from the crowd.
- Becky is on fire, and has some good lines. She says she made Charlotte's belt famous, and Charlotte says she made Becky famous. It falls of the rails after that.
- They could end up on the same brand? How is the "SMACKDOWN WOMEN'S CHAMPION" going to end up on Raw? Huh sir?
- WWE already not making sense of things and making it looks like they have no real plan.
- Becky says she has something to prove against Asuka.
- Kabuki Warriors come out and yell and laugh in Japanese.
- A big brawl breaks out and a ref comes out.
Kabuki Warriors defeated the Horsewomen (Becky Lynch & Charlotte Flair)
5.5/10
- Charlotte almost dropped Asuka on her head and landed Natural Selection.
- Charlotte catches Kairi midair and throws her overhead.
- Becky is tagged in and she runs wild.
- Lynch does for a double flying dropkick but just gets Asuka. Kairi follows with a great backfist.
- Deadly Drive on Kairi sane, followed by the Lynch Legdrop, which is the complete opposite of the Insane Elbow.
- Kairi Sane takes out Charlotte's knee. The ref is distracted with that.
- Asuka spits green mist into Becky's face during a Disarmher on Kairi.
- Kairi pins Becky!
- Asuka continues to have Becky Lynch's number. I hope that story is told at length one day
- Nikki Cross and Alexa Bliss make the save and lay out Kabuki Warriors.
Ricochet defeated Apollo Crews
5.75/10
- Apollo Crews and Ricochet cut promos that make me want to watch their match less. Ricochet mentions how close they are.
- I don't want to see Ricochet and Crews have a WWE Raw match. I want so see them have the match I know they can have.
- There are counters and flips galore, which is looking promising.
- A nice kick from Ricochet, and a nicer counter out of the 630 from Crews. These guys are so comfortable with each other and can play to their strengths.
- Recoil hits for the win.
FURY AND STROWMAN
- Tyson Fury is interviewed and says he wants an apology from Braun.
- Strowman says he'll apologize if Fury asks nicely.
- Fury gets a cheap pop for Bakersfield mention. He demands an apology.
- Strowman comes out and says he'll eat Tyson Fury for lunch.
- Strowman has a good line about the slow Wilder count in Fury's last fight.
- I hope they're not trying to make Fury a babyface, because he's a piece of shit.
- Fury has a nice line about Braun not winning any world titles, either.
- It is an interesting approach from WWE to stop pay for old ass wrestlers and instead pay for other combat sports stars for Saudi Arabia.
- Security keeps them apart, and both start knocking out security.
- The locker room empties out.
- The brawl continues
- Strowman backstage says he's not apologizing. He runs back out to fight.
Rating guide
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!
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