- Corey Graves and Peter Rosenberg are on the pre-show.
- I love the amalgamation of former America The Beautiful performances.
- Stephanie McMahon welcomes us to WrestleMania.
- Roman Reigns is still in the Mania intro. This is a more comical, green screen intro,
- I keep waiting for "ARE YA READY.....ARE YA READY FOR A GOOOOD TIME" to hit. But we get another AC/DC.
- Gronk does a pretty good intro. Mojo Rawley joins him.
- Paul Heyman cuts a promo about Drew McIntyre.
Cesaro defeated Drew Gulak
- This is Cesaro's first ever singles match at WrestleMania. It's Gulak's first Mania match ever.
- There's some great transitions early on, one into a powerbomb from Cesaro.
- Michael Cole is alone on commentary.
- Gulak does a tilt-a-whirl arm drag on Cesaro.
- These two are tearing it up. They're slugging it out, going from strike to submission attempt, and
- Cesaro finds luck with some great European uppercuts.
- CESARO DID THE UFO!!! And won with it!!
- Cesaro and Gulak went balls to the wall. That was a good way to kick things off.
- We need someone else to make a new Smackdown Six with Cesaro, Gulak, Zayn, Nakamura and Bryan.
- Michael Cole called the hell out of that match all by himself.
WWE Women's Tag Team Titles
Bliss Cross Applesauce defeated Kabuki Warriors (c) to win the titles
- I'm a fan of the Kabuki Warriors' trolling by dancing.
- The match starts off with some indie teasing so to speak. It gets pretty high flying, pretty fast with some dives to ringside.
- Bulldog/Basement dropkick hits Nikki Cross hard.
- We don't need a hundred camera cuts. Kairi is laying the punches in.
- Ugh, they do the god damn Del Rio stomp spot.
- Asuka might be my favorite empty arena wrestler in the world. I reserve the right to change this selection over the next two nights.
- Nikki hot tags, fires up, rips her vest off and hits a flying body press.
- What an odd edit cut that was with Sane breaking up the pin after The Purge.
- Asuka Lock on Nikki, Twisted Bliss to break that up, then Kairi with a spear.
- Powerbomb/Flying forearm doesn't get it for Kabuki Warriors. How was that a modified Doomsday Device!? It wasn't.
- Bliss pins Sane with Twisted Bliss to win the titles.
- That Women's Tag Team Match ruled. The lack of crowd is making WWE's ridiculous camera cuts more obvious.
Elias defeated Baron Corbin
- Corbin soaking in the lack of crowd is great.
- Elias shows up and breaks a guitar over Corbin's back.
- The match is official in the ring.
- Elias is aggressive, but outside of that guitar break, this is an hour one match on a throwaway Smackdown. With all that has happened, why not just run this on Friday? What's the difference?
- There's a terrible looking clothesline where Corbin bumps awkwardly.
- Elias hits an inverted Drift Away.
- Elias wins with a ROLL UP after Corbin gets caught cheating on a pin.
WWE Raw Women's Championship
Becky Lynch (c) defeated Shayna Baszler to retain the title
- I'm very interested in what kind of pace this Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler will keep with no crowd.
- Becky and Shayna slappin' some ribs with these opening strikes.
- Disarmher and Kirafuda Clutch attempts before Baszler hits a spinebuster. She follows up with a double underhook suplex variation.
- Rock Bottom on the apron for Becky, and the obligatory "hardest part of the ring" comment.
- Baszler slings Becky into the table and OUCH.
- Baszler applies Becky's Disarmher, but ends up connecting with a big knee.
- They're being really physical in this match.
- Baszler counters another Disarmher with the Kirafuda Clutch, but Becky gets the pin.
- Lynch gains the pin. I thought that finish was an anticlimactic one to a really good match. We've seen that transition hit on Shayna a lot. The match was a little too short, too.
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Sami Zayn (c) (w/ The Artists Collective) defeated Daniel Bryan (w/ Drew Gulak) to retain the title
- Zayn is killing time. The Artists Collective try to help Zayn, but Gulak takes them out.
- Bryan teases letting Zayn win by countout. Instead he beats the living shit out of Zayn.
- Zayn is begging, but Bryan takes his head off.
- Bryan beats Zayn's ass until The Artists Collective show up again.
- Zayn catches Bryan off the top rope with a Helluva Kick and wins.
- I wasn't as in love with this as many were.
WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championships
John Morrison (c) defeated Kofi Kingston (of New Day) and Jimmy Uso (of Usos) to retain the titles
- It's very clear they didn't pause for "takes" in this match.
- Kofi dives from the ropes to the ladder, but gets caught.
- Maybe the best Starship Pain I've ever seen, on Kofi bridged on a ladder in the corner.
- Kofi almost snagged the top rope on a trust fall tope, but it ends up looking awesome.
- Kofi then throws a ladder into Jimmy Uso walking on a barricade.
- Morrison does an incredible Spanish Fly to Kofi, almost into a ladder.
- I think this is Morrison's best performance of his current WWE run.
- Kofi Mushroom Stomps Morrison off the ladder. Uso RAMS Kofi into the ladder.
- Okay, we have to mic up the Usos for every match now. The trash talk is hilarious.
- I know they probably took safety precautions on the Uso spot to the outside, but it ended up just looking like bad camera work and production.
- The lack of crowd hasn't really caused me to enjoy these matches less. It's just different. Faster pace, different ways of working.
- All three men pull down the titles, but they knock Morrison off into a bridged ladder, and he takes the titles.
- This ruled.
- Kevin Owens is beating the brakes off of Seth Rollins.
- Rollins does a Falcon Arrow on the apron. They're hitting each other with some heavy moves.
- Swanton, Pop up Powerbomb both hit.
- They're having a really good match.
- Seth Rollins hits Kevin Owens with a bell for a DQ.
- Owens says those are the actions of a little bitch, not a god. He wants a No DQ match.
- Dying at Owens saying Rollins will always be a little bitch.
- Owens keeps hitting Rollins with the ring bell.
- Owens jumps off the WrestleMania sign through the table.
- Owens wins with a stunner
- This is Seth Rollins' first WrestleMania in which he won't have a win.
WWE 24/7 Championship
Mojo Rawley defeated R-Truth to become champion
- R-Truth is hiding from everyone, but runs into Mojo and Gronk.
- Gronk tries to win the title, but Mojo pulls him off and wins.
WWE Universal Championship
Braun Strowman defeated Bill Goldberg (c) to win the title
- A bunch of spears and Strowman kicks out.
- A bunch of powerslams and Braun wins. Thankfully.
- The Fiend was sacrificed for this.
- Let's move on past Bill Goldberg and any title belt. Summerslam 2019 was perfect.
The Undertaker defeated AJ Styles (w/ The OC)
- There's an Undertaker entrance in the graveyard, but AJ Styles pops out.
- Biker Taker is back.
- Undertaker Goldberg'd himself on the window!
- Taker throws AJ into a winshield and beats his ass before tossing him into a grave.
- WrestleMania main eventers Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows send druids after Undertaker.
- My wife is wondering if the pants are shoot pants or work pants.
- Taker disposes of the cronies, and AJ pops back up. Taker breaks his finger but AJ gets control.
- The music adds a lot to this. AJ Styles calls Taker a broken down old bitch.
- Styles cracks Taker with a shovel and into a grave.
- Styles is on a tractor, but Taker appears behind him.
- Undertaker explodes a building and beats up The Club on a roof. He throws Gallows off, and Tombstones Karl Anderson on top of it.
- Undertaker chokeslams Styles off the roof through a piece of wood.
- Taker is trash talking Styles and says he's tougher than he thought. Styles apologizes.
- Taker Sparta kicks Styles in the grave and buries him. There's a headstone with Styles' name on it.
- This was outside the box, different and fun. Styles' arm is out of the dirt as we close.
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!