Kris Statlander, get ready to empty out your bank account.
Stokely Hathaway announced today on Twitter that he is suing 'Kristen Statlander' for 1.7 billion dollars following the infamous slap that she delivered on the back of his big ass head on a previous edition of AEW Rampage. Hathaway recalled that he is suffering from PTSD from the tragic event, specifically telling a story about how the slap sounds just like the noise Keith Lee makes when he's 'tearing some' pop rocks up in catering. Hathaway even went as far as to insult Lee for eating said pop rocks.
When asked by a reporter what he is going to do with all of the money, Hathaway said he was going to give back to his community, buy a few Louis Vuitton bags for Jade Cargill and the baddies, a new car, some new OnlyFans subscriptions and a pitbull. When asked for clarification on if he likes dogs, Hathaway said that he actually wants to own multi time platinum recording artist 'Mr. Worldwide' himself, Pitbull.
If you're wondering whether or not Tony Khan approves of Hathway's anctics, well, he does. Click here to learn more.
Not only is Stokely the publicist for Jade Cargill and the Baddies, but he will be part of "Kyle Lewis Pres. AEW’s Stokely Hathaway Live At The Stand!" in New York on June 25. The show features comedians from Comedy Central, VICE, MTV. Fans can learn more, and get $5 off tickets by using the code KYLE, by clicking here.
Fightful will have live coverage of AEW Dynamite beginning at 8 p.m. ET.