WWE United States Championship
Apollo Crews (c) defeated Andrade (w/ Zelina & Angel Garza)
- Kevin Owens joins commentary and has a tie on. He actually starts calling the match.
- "He's no Angel! He actually acts the complete opposite!"- Kevin Owens on Angel Garza.
- Andrade gets slammed into the diamond plates.
- Apollo avoiding the Del Rio Stomp leads me to believe he should be #1 in this year's PWI 500.
- Apollo does the corner belly-to-belly, which looks great.
- Andrade busts out a great slingshot DDT.
- Owens beats up Garza as he tried to interfere.
- Apollo counters the Hammerlock DDT with the Toss powerbomb for the win.
- I guess you could say the Catering Crew ate tonight heehehehehehhehee.
WWE Women's Tag Team Titles
Boss N' Hug Connection (c) defeated Bliss Cross Applesauce and The IIconics
- Bayley Dos Straps! This was one of my most anticipated matches of the night.
- Sasha Banks and Peyton Royce work really well together.
- This is very fast paced, and they're pulling it off really well.
- The spots here all go together great. Boss N' Hug do an elevated knee to Billie.
- Alexa takes over, and punches Billie in the face.
- This is what we've all known the women's tag team division could bring us.
- Peyton does a suicide dive onto two opponents on the apron, onto the pile outside!!
- IIconics hit an elevated bicycle knee, then their finish. Bliss Cross Applesauce hit their finish on Peyton.
- Alexa does Twisted Bliss, but Sasha Banks pins Bliss out of it.
- This was INCREDIBLE. IIconics have worked so hard to get better.
Sheamus defeated Jeff Hardy
- This feud fucking sucks, man. The delivery in these promos is so bad, and a lot of what has been wrong with WWE promos for a long time.
- At least they're knocking the living shit out of each other.
- Sheamus slams Jeff's knee into the turnbuckle, and later does a Gunnslinger that slams Hardy's face into the ground.
- A Whisper In The Wind hits on Sheamus, and it's a really good one.
- Sheamus knocks Jeff off the top rope for a Swanton and hits White Noise.
- The audience is chanting "urine trouble."
- Texas Cloverleaf applied by Sheamus.
- There was a great Brogue Kick that caught Jeff Hardy off the railing.
- Hardy gets Sheamus with Twist of Fate and a Swanton after Sheamus gets posted.
- Sheamus' foot gets on the ropes and Brogue Kicks Jeff for the win.
- Sheamus vs. Jeff Hardy definitely overdelivered based on the build.
WWE Raw Women's Championship
Asuka (c) and Nia Jax go to a double countout
- Asuka locks up an Octopus very early on.
- This is Asuka running and flying around, and Nia Jax serving as a base and a cutoff.
- Asuka gets mad when Nia mentions Kairi and beats her ass.
- Asuka's head bounces off the ground on a Jackhammer, and gets powerbombed.
- Head kicks a plenty, but the two brawl outside.
- Asuka doesn't make it back in and there's a double countout.
- Asuka wrecks Nia's face with her ass after the match.
WWE Universal Championship
Braun Strowman (c) defeated Miz & Morrison
- Miz and Morrison find out backstage that only one of them can be champion -- the person who makes the pin.
- They premiere their Van Halen "Jump" knockoff video for "Hey Hey Ho Ho." That should be their theme.
- Miz and especially Morrison fly all over the place. This emulates the last match, but with more ingredients.
- Morrison does a great dive outside, and there's a double team Skull Crushing Finale.
- Braun wins by chokeslamming Miz, and catching Morrison with a punch before a running powerslam.
- Solid match.
Drew McIntyre (c) defeated Bobby Lashley (w/ MVP)
- Lana tells MVP this match is important and she should be out there. MVP says it's Lashley's call, not his. She watches on backstage.
- Lashley attacks Drew with a Full Nelson before the jacket is even off. Refs have to pull them apart.
- Oh my god. That was almost really scary for Drew McIntyre. He about got spiked on his head.
- Drew throws Lashley into the plexiglass, and suplexes him into the barricade.
- Drew kicks out at one after a great spinebuster and flatliner.
- There are some great counters. A superplex hits for Lashley.
- Drew counters a spear with a double wristlock.
- Lana distracts Lashley and Drew hits a Claymore. This was a really good match.
Street Profits vs. Viking Raiders
- Street Profits and Viking Raiders tearing up Braun's car is the BEST skit they've done so far.
- They brawl into the backstage. There are cinematic elements to this.
- Viking Raiders have a bowling ball among their weapons. The Street Profits wanna fight like MEN.
- Street Profits use a recycled Chappelle joke.
- Ivar bowls a ball into Montez's nutsack.
- Angelo tackles Ivar through a glass window.
- They're all not happy.
- Akira Tozawa.................shows up with ninjas and he's wearing a gi. Yep. Bruce is in charge of Raw.
- The Viking Profits take out everyone.
- They throw ninjas through a damn car.
- Jordan from NXT was one of the big ninjas.
- The teams brawl on top of the semi and fall off into the trash.
- Jessika Karr shows up and yells at them.
- Some kind of trash monster chases them off. No match. This was fun.
THE GREATEST WRESTLING MATCH EVER
Randy Orton defeated Edge
- Okay, I almost teared up at the Howard Finkel introductions.
- Charles Robinson is in the old ref gear
- The crowd is up more for this one. Mainly because they piped in crowd noise.
- Orton is beating Edge with elementary wrestling stuff. A trip on a drop down. This is great.
- Edge catches Orton with a fake out boot outside the ring.
- Edge does a clothesline to Edge off the top rope to the apron.
- ORTON IS BUSTED OPEN.
- Edge applies a crossface.
- Edge applies the Antivenom, but Orton used a modified neckbreaker instead of his backbreaker.
- Randy Orton: "I'm gonna fucking kill you motherfucker."
- Edge does the Three Amigos!
- Orton does a superplex, with a special camera angle.
- The canned audio is a weird choice.
- Edgecution hits for a two count. A flying cross body gets two.
- Orton does an Angle Slam.
- Edge counters a dropkick with a sitdown powerbomb. He later hits an Edge O Matic and an Unprettier. A nice ode to Christian.
- Pedigree from Orton! A Rock Bottom from Edge!
- They go into a pin series, and Randy Orton drills Edge with an RKO.
- Orton kicks out of two spears.
- Edge is caught flying off the ropes with an RKO, but kicks out.
- Randy Orton PUNTS Edge and beats him after going low on the Antivenom.
- This was legitimately awesome.
- Randy Orton tells Edge to go home and be with his family. He tells Edge to tell uncle Randy he said hi.
- Edge is resisting the stretcher as Orton looks on.
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!